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January 16, 2017 by Arlene Jaroslaw
If He Was a She
Nov. 12, 2016
Donald J. Trump had just been elected President of the United States of America and my brain was in overdrive; a bottomless pit of despair. For the first time that I could remember, sleep eluded me. Harry suggested I try a sleeping pill, and though I resisted at first, in the end, I relented and found myself giving in to a tranquility that wrapped itself around me like a benevolent lover only to be betrayed a few hours later by a fitful and disturbing dream; a dream that moves the calendar back and the clock from evening to early morning.
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THE DREAM
Harry, always an early riser, has brought the newspapers in from our front door and they now lay scattered on our dining room table with the news section opened to the editorial page. I sit, sipping my morning coffee resolved to ignore any news and just get on with breakfast. But the headline in front of me is too toxic to ignore.
EDITORIAL: May 7, 2016 A28
A Jezebel Nominee for Highest Office in the Land
We all thought that the race in this year’s Presidential primary campaign could not get any dirtier. Well, it could and it has. Samantha Drew, who first served as U.S. Ambassador to the United Nations and then Attorney General under President Garner before throwing her name into the ring is under pressure to step down from her position as the favored nominee of her party following the release of a video in which Ms. Drew is heard bragging about her predatory sexual exploitations of young men in her employ, including under age adolescents. Her depravity is almost too graphic for print journalism. However, the Editorial Board of this newspaper has determined that, in this case, with so much at stake in our national election, fair and factual reporting eclipses decorum.
In the video we hear Ms. Drew speaking to an associate who is obviously enjoying and encouraging her titillating revelations. Ms. Drew boasts of her power as Attorney General. “Those young boys on my staff? There were times I just had to kiss them. I couldn’t help myself. One of them had a 15-year-old brother who was performing in an all male dance recital at his high school. The family invited me to the recital and before the curtain went up, while the kids were dressing for their roles, I just waltzed into their dressing area. Some of those boys were really hot!” Her associate marvels at this, “And they didn’t say anything?” “No, of course not. When you’re important you can do anything; even grab their cocks!” Then there is more laughter.
This from the woman who purports to be the leader and the moral compass of the free world. Given the power of the President, what further lecheries would she be capable of? Ms. Drew’s campaign manager would have us believe this was merely “girl talk.” We say “no!”
No to such sugar coated palliatives and no to her ambitions. For make no mistake about it; Samantha Drew threatens the very sanctity of womanhood which holds that fair gender to the highest human standards. Ms. Drew in no way befits the scriptural injunction of a woman of valor.
The world awaits the words of President Garner who will be holding a press conference at noon today. Ms. Drew’s husband, Mr. Hadley Garrison Drew, who served as Ambassador to France under President Moore and who is now Chief Advisor to the Open World Foundation, which financially supports civil society groups around the world, is also expected to make a public statement this evening regarding this turn of events. Their two children, Sarah and Alexander are studying abroad. Ms. Drew, aided by her record of public service devoted mainly to underserved children and families, the family’s long established connections to the country’s political and financial power brokers and the know-how of her well oiled campaign strategists, has managed to survive other questionable aspects of her past; namely; Mr. Drew’s past marital infidelities, the infamous Blackwater scandal and her too cozy relationship with corporate America. But these new disclosures add a dimension of indecency that cannot be overlooked.
The good people of this country will not abide a sexual predator as President. The nation, indeed, the world is convulsed in outcries of censure. Protesters are spilling out into the streets of every city and hamlet; from east to west and north to south. Never before, in modern campaign history has there been such an outpouring of public condemnation. The high moral ground has even eclipsed party loyalty.
We join politicians from both sides of the aisle, spokespersons from the “alt-right,” libertarians, socialists; people of faith and non-believers alike including; ironically (but as yet unconfirmed) His Eminence, Charles Cardinal Murphy of the Archdiocese of Ms. Drew’s home state in demanding that Ms. Drew step down and allow the three other well qualified nominees of her party to get on with the business of campaigning without the taint of immorality hanging in the background.
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Nov. 13, 2016
The next morning I awaken from my dream into the real world and a real nightmare. A sexual predator actually is President Elect of the United States.
Ms. Jaroslaw, a retired clinical social worker, mother of four and grandmother of 10, battled over her 81+ years for civil rights, a woman’s right to choose and gender equality. Her memories and lessons learned from the “old” Bronx strengthen her resolve to keep fighting in the days ahead.
The views and opinions expressed in this article are the author’s own and do not necessarily reflect those of Lilith Magazine.
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January 12, 2017 by Israela Margalit
Only a Nurse
For reasons unknown to me, Lake Erie College decided to give me an honorary doctorate in humane letters. When the dean first called, I thought it was a hoax. Then he called again. I told my three-year-old, and she said that I couldn’t be a doctor, only a nurse. Years of speechifying and legal fights, and my toddler had summed up the global state of womanhood in three words. Already a year earlier my son had asked me if people thought his conductor-father was more important than I was, given how they applauded everything he did. That was during a long sabbatical I took to care for my kids, when I mutated from globetrotting concert pianist to carpool driver.
Children speak the truth: a medical doctor is a man more often than not, and the workingman has a higher social status than the stay-at-home mom. That said, a mother who bakes cookies is more nurturing than one who is celebrated on stage.
“We’re proud of your success, Mom, but can’t you postpone your career until we’re eighteen?”
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January 11, 2017 by Amy Stone
Keep Your Breasts Behind Locked Doors!
Exterior of Mamava freestanding pod for “privacy for pumping or breastfeeding.” It locks from inside, with a space larger than an airplane lavatory. Photo credit: Amy Stone.
En route from the illy coffee concession to the Virgin America boarding gates at Newark Airport, I spied the pod. With my cascading fears of a new administration’s erosion of women’s freedoms, I felt alarm. Will women feel pressured into never breastfeeding their babies publicly? Are breasts only for grabbing in public by men newly freed from restraint by a power-tripping president-to-be?
My bias in favor of female visibility and freedom is obvious. But I am not beyond fine-tuning. What about women from traditional backgrounds—Orthodox Jewish women, traditional Muslim women—might they welcome a privacy pod? Maybe I should slow down my rush to judgment, be a bit more sisterly.
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January 10, 2017 by Eleanor J. Bader
The Transformative Work of JFREJ’s Jews of Color Caucus
Photo credit: Erik McGregor.
“I identify as a Black, multi-race, Jewish woman of color,” 31-year-old social worker-teacher-activist Shoshana Brown says by way of introduction. Now active in the Jews of Color Caucus of Jews for Racial and Economic Justice [JFREJ], Bronx-born Brown has many questions about how best to oppose racism and white supremacy. Indeed, Brown’s queries address strategic and tactical concerns that are important for all progressive social justice efforts—religious and secular, Jewish and non—as we enter the uncharted terrain of Trumplandia.
Brown spoke to Lilith reporter Eleanor J. Bader about the Caucus’ ongoing work in late December.
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January 9, 2017 by Arlene Jaroslaw
A Daughter’s Farewell
1971
It was the first seder night and for me, the 36th year I’d celebrated it at my parents’ table. And this year, it was truly a celebratory time. My father, Joe had just been discharged from the hospital following a week of unexplained neurological “events”; blinding headaches, episodic confusion and finally a fall following a momentary loss of consciousness. Now, we gathered—content that all that was behind us.
There were only eight of us around the table; Mom, Dad, Manny (my brother), Harry and me, and our three young children. So unlike years past when a crowded dining room table hosted aunts, uncles and cousins in addition to our immediate family. Tonight we sat at the kitchen table. The dining room table which, when not in use, folded into a lovely console remained unopened in my parents’ foyer; an omen of what lay ahead.
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January 6, 2017 by Joshua Wolfsun
The Mainstream Misogyny of the Nice Jewish Boy
Often, he’s mentioned with a wink, a smile, and a tongue planted firmly in cheek. But almost as often, he’s discussed with seriousness. He comes up when the niece is planning to marry a Protestant, a Catholic (worse), a Muslim (god-forbid!), or any other manner of goyish brute. He is everything a parent would want for their daughter. He is, of course, straight.
Thoughtful, studious, sensitive, successful, and a caring provider, he is the opposite of threatening. He will always be there with a funny joke, an understanding glance, and the utmost respect for his parents and yours. He is made of better stock than the gentile suitors, and it shows. He is the man, the myth, the legend: the Nice Jewish Boy.
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January 5, 2017 by Merri Ukraincik
Love’s Labor’s Lost
What struck me most when I stepped outside on that December morning was the scent in the air. Not the cold as it pricked my skin like a million shards of glass or the awkward way the sunbeams sliced through the sky. Rather the wintry, almost funereal aroma, like a coat worn for too long before it gets tucked into the back of a closet and forgotten.
I was then expecting our second child. But only my husband and our doctor knew. As we’d done with our eldest, we were waiting until we had passed the precarious first trimester to share the news. Kein ayin hara. We didn’t dare play with fire.
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January 3, 2017 by Maya Roman
The IDF and Sexual Predators? Israeli Feminists Protest an Officer’s Plea Bargain
On the 1st of December, 2016, Ofek Buchris, one of Israel’s most decorated military officers and former head of the Golani brigade, signed a plea bargain admitting to “conduct unbecoming an officer” and “wrongful consensual intercourse”. This admission came after half a year of vehemently denying he had any kind of physical relationship with his two accusers. Following the initial complaints against him, Buchris retired from the military (and therefore will receive his very handsome military pension), promising he would combat the allegations as a civilian. Buchris had initially been charged with rape, sodomy, sexual assault and conduct unbecoming an officer.
Ofek Buchris was considered a national hero, and for some, even after the plea bargain, he still is. He had won the chief of staff citation, a high military honor, for his actions during operation “Defensive Shield” in 2002. He was a decorated soldier and revered leader, one of the guys. Many of his friends and colleagues closed ranks around him and spoke up in the media about his character, claiming he could never have done what he was being accused of committing.
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December 31, 2016 by Susan Weidman Schneider
What To Do Next: A New Year Letter from the Editor
I recall vividly both the JFK assassination and the attacks of 9/11, and a good deal about the emotional response to our current moment feels eerily similar, though no lives have [yet] been lost. The disbelief. The comments that so many feel we should have a shiva ritual for our collective mourning and fear of what’s to come.
As women and as Jews we have experienced enough frightening statements, real threats, vile ideation and a torquing of our expectations these past few months to leave us vertiginous, angry and grieving as toxic strains of misogyny, anti-Semitism, bigotry and bias move rapidly through our world.
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