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January 3, 2011 by Liz Lawler
No, This Isn’t PMS: You Are Just Really Annoying
I did an about face this month. I decided to stop believing in PMS.
It’s kind of pathetic, but I hadn’t even considered the culturally fabricated origins of this bio-myth until stumbling across this debate, in a blog that I sometimes read. It was kind of like finding out that the Tooth Fairy doesn’t exist—obvious in hindsight, but earth shattering in the moment.
Because let me be clear: I have blamed my hormones for a LOT.
Allow me to back up and clarify: hormones matter. In the months after weaning my son and moving from hormonal birth control to a barrier method, there was an, ahem, “adjustment period.” It was palpably related to my cycle, though my frustrations with early parenthood and the NY real estate market were also clear contributors (I mean really, who hasn’t wanted to kill their partner over a condo purchase?). The depression and anger came in waves that I could just glimpse before they engulfed me. But the dust has settled. I am also prone to, when surrounded by breastfeeding women, spring a leak, so to speak. The physical responses to hormonal changes are undeniable–cramps, bloating, fatigue, etc. (and might reasonably induce crankiness). But a dip in estrogen cannot be certifiably, medically equated with a loss of common sense, emotional balance, composure. Seriously, look it up. (more…)
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January 3, 2011 by Maya Bernstein
Puppy Love
I’ve fallen for a dog named Duncan. He is the new love of my life. He has long black hair, and is the size of a large boot. He’s not a smiley dog – he’s quite serious, but can you expect anything else from a working dog? He makes good money, too. And he seems to have a strange habit of not walking upstairs, but being carried, while caressed, sweet nothings (in the form of the word “seek”) being whispered in his ear. I think I can handle that.
But – I get ahead of myself. Let us begin at the beginning.
My daughter woke up one day last week with a number of suspicious red dots on her legs. She complained that they itched. When, after three days, they seemed to increase in number, we took her to the doctor. Here’s where it gets exciting – ready? The doctor said that it didn’t look like spider-bites (spiders, I learned a couple of days later, are wonderful critters to have in your house); it didn’t look like scabies; and – here’s the clincher – it’s possible they could be bed bug bites. (more…)
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January 3, 2011 by Elizabeth Mandel
Feminists In Focus: The Market For Organ Trade
I recently returned from the International Documentary Film Festival Amsterdam, Europe’s premier documentary film festival. It seemed apt, in a city infamous for its offering of everything for sale, to see Rama Rau’s “The Market,” the story of Sandra, a Canadian single mother desperately in need of a kidney, and the residents of a slum on the outskirts of Chennai, India, who are offering their kidneys for sale.
I intentionally avoided writing “the residents…who are willing to sell,” because “The Market” skillfully raises and explores the question of what “willing” means, when there are no choices. For the people — primarily women — of Villivakkam, the commodification of their bodies is their only option; they must sell off the one thing they possess in order to keep themselves and their families alive. This question has been often explored in relation to sex work: when a woman, lacking opportunity, education, status and access to resources “chooses” prostitution, is it really a choice? In the words of one of the men who has sold his kidney, “We are fishermen by birth, we used to sell parts of the fish in the market but now we cut and sell parts of ourselves. They have made us the market.” (more…)
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December 24, 2010 by Jill Finkelstein
Link Roundup: The Personal is Political- A Week in Human Rights
Welcome to this week’s installment of Lilith’s Link Roundup. Each week we post Jewish and feminist highlights from around the web. If there’s anything you want to be sure we know about, email us or leave a message in the comments section below.
This past Saturday, the U.S. Senate voted to repeal Don’t Ask Don’t Tell, a policy that has discriminated against openly gay men and women serving in the military. On Wednesday, President Obama officially signed the repeal. [NYT]
In other political news, the Domestic Minor Sex Trafficking Deterrence and Victims Support Act of 2010 came close to being passed this past week. On Tuesday, the U.S. House passed a bill almost identical to the version that the U.S. Senate unanimously passed on December 9th, with some minor amendments. The new version was sent back to the Senate to be voted on before ending the lame duck session, but was blocked by Senator Jeffrey Sessions (R-AL). [Huffington Post]
Last week, the Congressional Joint Economic Committee (JEC), led by Representative Carolyn Maloney (D-NY), released Invest in Women, Invest in America: A Comprehensive Review of Women in the US Economy, a comprehensive assessment of women’s role in the economy. The study highlights the negative effects of inflexible work and family policies imposed on many women in the workforce. [Ms. Magazine]
Parenting columnist, Anna Solomon, recently wrote about her experience feeling alienated by religion while having a toddler daughter who’s in love with all things Jewish. [Kveller]
This month’s issue of EROS features an interesting Q&A with Lilith, the world’s first woman, as imagined by Elissa Strauss. [LABA]
Jewish teens from four major International Jewish Youth Movements have joined forces to end bullying and support LGBTQ Teens. Their goal is to get 18,000 Jews to sign the Jewish Community Pledge to Save Lives by the end of the year. The upcoming issue of Lilith will feature some of the anti-homophobia efforts in the Jewish community, including one for LGBT middle-school students. [JTA]
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December 22, 2010 by Liz Lawler
Strangled by a Pink Ribbon Or: Breast Reconstruction Surgery 101
I do not have cancer. Or if I do, it’s still worming its weaselly way to the surface of my life. Like most people, I have relatives who have had various incarnations of the disease, some who have died of it. I was recently counseled by my doctor that given my family history, I should be tested for the BRCA1 and 2 genes. It has been on the back burner for several months now, a chore I know needs tending to, but one I’m loath to address. Because knowing that I am a carrier would leave me with the awful question of: what now? If I test positive, the good news is that my insurance will pay for a prophylactic mastectomy. And then, I’m entitled to a brand-new pair.
I am not particularly attached (other than at the literal, fleshy level) to these pointy little orbs on my chest. I am a scant A-cup. I really only wear a bra because of nipple decorum. I don’t “need the support” like some women, my pecs hold them up just fine. And though they fed my son, and still nourish my sexuality, I don’t think I would miss them terribly if they fell off altogether in the shower one day. This is how I feel today, on the front end of my childbearing years. But my maternal grandmother was diagnosed in her late thirties; do I really have the time to put this off? Do I have the luxury of being flippant? And as Jewish women, do you? If you carry the gene, you have an 85% chance of developing breast cancer and 60% of developing ovarian cancer by 70. A 2009 study noted that Ashkenazi women are 20 times more likely to be carriers of the gene than the non-Jewish population. There is some concern about genetic counseling being used to stigmatize Jews, but most simply take the statistic as strong caution to be vigilant. I might set aside my concerns over racial profiling if it could keep me alive (but I digress).
I recently took a teacher training program to learn to teach yoga to cancer survivors (if you are so inclined, this is the one to take, IMHO). Tari devoted a large portion of the program to the challenges posed by the “reconstructive surgery” process. It turns out that, in an effort to return women to “femininity” and “normalcy” (not my words), we end up limiting their range of motion.
So how do you rebuild a breast? (more…)
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December 22, 2010 by Amy Kronish
Personalizing the National
I was recently a guest at the Corrymeela Residential center in Ballycastle, Northern Ireland, where, as one of a team leading workshops on facilitating dialogue groups, I used major clips from Yulie Cohen’s trilogy of documentary films about contemporary Israel. Not surprisingly, Cohen’s unique films which deal with personal reconciliation, both on a national level and a familial level, struck a sympathetic chord with viewers in Northern Ireland and her comments, “peace can come from us” and “I want to try another way”, spoke to their contemporary reality.
Cohen’s personal story reflects the story of the nation. She is an Israeli woman who grew up in Tzahala, an upper middle class neighborhood of the aristocratic military elite, dreaming of becoming an officer in the Israel Defense Forces. After serving in the airforce, she became a stewardess for El Al and, in 1978, was wounded in a terrorist attack which was carried out against an El Al flight crew in London. Now, years later, married and the mother of two little girls, she is trying to come to terms with that formative experience. (more…)
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December 22, 2010 by Modesty Blasé
Guardians of the Modest Hemline
‘Say Amen, Mummy.’ My youngest daughter is full of enthusiasm for her brachos (blessings). As every modest mother knows, training our children to say blessings before and after food is one of the pleasures of parenting. So it came as a surprise to find women acting like children at a ‘brachos party.’ Advertised as an opportunity ‘to make some brachot, eat some food, and say amen – let’s do our hishtadlut (effort) to help our fellow Jews in their time of need. All this, plus a Devar Torah at the end – all in under an hour. Make it one of the best hours you’ve spent, and turn up!’ Well – I just couldn’t resist. (more…)
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December 18, 2010 by Jill Finkelstein
Link Roundup: Women Rabbis and the Great Christmas Tree Debate
Welcome to this week’s installment of Lilith’s Link Roundup. Each week we’ll post Jewish and feminist highlights from around the web. If there’s anything you want to be sure we know about, email us or leave a message in the comments section below.
This week, Jessica Grose and Mark Oppenheimer debated whether or not Jews should own Christmas trees. In their four-part debate, they discussed the social and religious implications of this dilemma that is frequently faced by many interfaith couples like Jessica and her gentile husband. She adds, “Naming my kid Mary or festooning a fir tree does not negate my deeply felt Jewishness, nor does it dilute the Jewish traditions I still follow.” [Slate]
Last week, we reported the Hanukkah celebration that brought the first Reform, Conservative, Reconstructionist, and Orthodox women Rabbis together for the first time. The event will appear in an upcoming documentary on female Rabbis that is currently being filmed by Rabbi Lynne Kern and filmmaker Ronda Spinak. [JTA]
Moment Magazine also highlighted women rabbis in their latest issue, with a special feature on Sara Hurwitz, the first Orthodox Rabba. In addition, they discussed a new trend in Orthodox Judaism, known as partnership minyans. These minyans hope to add gender equality to prayer by requiring 10 men and 10 women to be present. [IntheMoment]
Sometime in the upcoming months, Women and Their Bodies (WTB), an NGO working to promote comprehensive social change in the health attitudes of Israeli women (both Jewish and Arab), will release Hebrew and Arabic editions of Our Bodies, Ourselves.
On Thursday night, the House failed to pass The International Protecting Girls by Preventing Child Marriage Act, which would have created a plan to stop the harmful practice that affects millions of girls each year. [Feministing]
We’re proud to share that Lilith contributing editor Amy Stone’s Letter to the Editor was featured in the New York Times. Amy, one of Lilith’s founders, wrote in response to an article on Jewish burial traditions. She previously wrote about Feminist Funerals in Lilith’s Spring 2009 issue. [NYT]
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December 10, 2010 by Jill Finkelstein
Link Roundup: Women to Watch and Feminist Current Events
Welcome to this week’s installment of Lilith’s Link Roundup. Each week we’ll post Jewish and feminist highlights from around the web. If there’s anything you want to be sure we know about, email us or leave a message in the comments section below.
On Monday, Jewish Women International (JWI) honored its 2010 Women to Watch. The honorees consisted of women who have used their careers to make a difference in the world. Each of the women shared their stories with the audience and offered their “Pearl of Wisdom.” [JWI]
Also on Monday, for the first time ever, the first female Rabbis of each of the major sects of Judaism gathered together to celebrate Hanukkah. [Wicked Local]
Want to know the latest scoop on Don’t Ask Don’t Tell? Ms. Magazine posted a full update with everything you need to know about DADT. [Ms. Magazine]
If you’re looking for a go to place for feminist current events, check out Women’s Funding Network’s daily roundup of news affecting women and girls around the world. [Women’s Funding Network]
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December 4, 2010 by Jill Finkelstein
Hanukkah Inspires Activism–and Special Giftingism, from Lilith to You!
Welcome to this week’s installment of Lilith’s Link Roundup. Each week we’ll post Jewish and feminist highlights from around the web. If there’s anything you want to be sure we know about, email us or leave a message in the comments section below.
November 25th kicked off 16 Days of Activism Against Gender Violence Campaign, sponsored by the Center for Women’s Global Leadership at Rutgers University. This year’s theme is Structures of Violence: Defining the Intersections of Militarism and Violence Against Women. The site offers resources and a calendar of activism events from around the world.
This week, the Senate Foreign Relations Committee was scheduled to vote on the International Violence Against Women Act (IVAWA). Amnesty International started a Twitter advocacy plan on Twitter this week encouraging people to spread the word and take action. [Human Rights Now]
On Wednesday, Google honored the 55th anniversary of the day that civil rights activist Rosa Parks refused to give up her seat on the bus to a white man. [Mashable]
Italian illustrator Alexsandro Palombo stirred up controversy with his sexualized interpretations of Anne Frank. [Jezebel]
A couple weeks ago, a study revealed that there is a significant wage gap among Jewish communal professionals. This week, Jill Jacobs, Rabbi-in-Residence at Jewish Funds for Justice, proposed a plan on how the Jewish community can close the gap and make sure that women are being fairly compensated for their work. [The Forward]
Gloria Feldt, women’s rights activist and author of “No Excuses: 9 Ways Women Can Change How We Think About Power,” also offered advice on how female Jewish communal service professionals can get ahead and earn more money. [The Sisterhood]
Our upcoming Winter 2010 issue will include a major feature on women & work, including a report on the Jewish communal service wage gap study, conducted by Steve Cohen, and an amazing profile of Sara Horowitz, who started the Freelancers Union. We are currently offering a Huge Hanukkah Subscription Discount. Order now now through December 8th and save almost half on new subscriptions and gift subscriptions when you use the promo code HAN10!
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